Dimentional Gaurdian Force Season Two
Episode Six: Mass Destruction
By: W.Bob Yankovic
Well my friends I am back and coming on strong. I refuse to write a disclamer simply to see if someone will sue me. That's right, anyone out there feel lucky? Sue me, come on I dare you. What, no answer, that is what I thought. So to all you people out there whom I am ripping off, screw you. Except for George Lucas, who is actually a pretty cool guy. Enjoy the fic.
"Why did Luke have to go and get stuck in NCC right when I need him?" I asked. "Your dumb luck," Ray answered. "Yeah, I thought so," I replied. We were flying through hyperspace in my H-Wings after returning Lokce and Link to their home dimentions. I was pretty ticked at the fact that as soon as I find out that I have more Force power than I thought, my only hope of a trainer is stuck in a planet-sized forcefield. "We are almost there," I said as I looked at my ETA display. We were flying back to our interim NCC on a planet in a secret dimention, (no I won't tell you which dimention, you might be some type of spy, or maybe just a really big goober). "Well we have several thousand terrabites of info to go through now," Ray said. "Don't remind me," I said sarcastically. We emerged from hyperspace and dropped into the atmosphere of the planet.
"Three hundred more!" I screamed, "That is gonna take forever." "Well just be glad I took out the other hundred," Ray said. "Oh, that makes me feel much better," I shot back, "it took you half a year to do that." "But there are two of us now, and we are a little more supped up thanks to the Vortex." "Yeah but still, aww forget it I need some chocolate," I said. I proceded to dig around in my pack and pulled out a foot long bar of solid chocolate, "Should do for a start." "Anyway, we could just find out where Kun is doing this and blow him to bits," Ray suggested. "Yeah, you just put out an APB on the guy, we should have him in about a thousand years or so," I countered. "True, wait I have an idea," he said. "What?" I asked. "Guru," he answered. "Who (don't go there) or what is that?" I asked. "You know the Eldest Namek, the guy that helped Goku out, the one that can unlock hidden powers, any of this hitting anything in that little pea brain of yours?" he asked. "I am gonna look over that last comment, and yes I do know who you are talking about. And it seems like a pretty good idea to me," I said. "Well lets go," Ray said. "Wait a minute, we can't just pop up there, we have to take a long way in," "What do you mean?" Ray asked. "Listen, if this is Kun we are talking about, don't you think that he would know about my "hidden" powers? We can't just waltz in the door and expect to be unnoticed," I said. "Good point, maybe you have a potato instead of a pea," Ray said. "Don't push it," I said.
We entered the dimention about ten or twelve light years away from Namek. We made a quick hyperspace jump and decided that the since Namek had no light side, we should make landfall across the planet from Guru's house. We set down and started on the two hour Vortex enabled power run across the planet. When we got there an adolecent Namek boy came out and greeted us. "Hi my name is Dendea. Are you here to see Master Guru?" "Yeah, we were hoping that he could give us a little boost," Ray said. "We are friends of Gohan and Goku," I said. "Oh, then come right in," he said. We walked into the building and stepped on a small platform that rose up through the ceiling. When we reached the top we sttod in awe at a huge Namek, he appeared to be extremely powerful. "Welcome, I am Guru, the Eldest Namek. Do you wish for me to unlock your hidden powers?" he asked. "Yes, if you would find us fitting to recieve it," I said. "Come close," he asked. Ray and I walked over to him and he placed a hand on my head. "You have a large amount of power inside you, but I feel that the majority of it is evil power. Your intent is honorable, but will you be able to keep the evil in check?" "Yes, Master Guru, and if I can't I am sure that my friend can," I answered. "So be it," he said. With that I felt a strange and eerie feeling flow over me. It started as a tingle but then erupted into a half itch half burn. He took his hand off then it exploded, a small blue flame encased me and I felt myself being tapped into the Force. After a moment the feeling passed and Guru looked at Ray. He placed his hand on his head and then took it off. "I am sorry, I felt the presence of an emmence power, but if I let it go it will destroy you," he said. "That is great," Ray said, "Be blown up by my own power or not gain any." "Thank you Master Guru. Unfortunatly we need to be off, we have a vast mission in front of us," I cut in. "You are welcome my son, be off and good fortune to you," he said.
We started from the top of the list and began to reak havoc through the lines of the Destroyers. We had taken down another hundred in two months. I found that when I fought the Dark Side was always on tap but I never drank of it. Ray said that he was glad that I was with him because it took him alot longer to hack into the system and set the self destruct. He said that he had resorted to just blowing a couple of stations up after scanning the hard records. I had to admit his way was more fun. It had been about a day since the last time we had taken out a generator. We decided that it was about time to take a break. We had been running on one or two hours of sleep for the past months and were pretty tierd. We sat down at the War Table and started planning out the next attack. "I say we go by dimention," I said. "No, we need to go by order of importance, greatest to least, maybe that way we can weaken the sheild enough to blast through," he countered. "Ok, that sound good, lets try that one right there," I said as I pointed to a large reactor in Mul D'Rylthi, a dimention that had been all but destroyed by the Vortex itself. "Yeah that looks like a good place, you know anything about it?" Ray said. "Yeah, it got toasted by the Vortex after the race there became to strong and evil for the Universe's own good. I think that a few of them survived because they were conquering some other dimention. There weren't more than a hundred left after that. It is pretty primative, they never bounced back," I concluded. "Sounds like a nice place for vacation," Ray said. "Yeah," I said.
We flew through the portal and popped up in the wasted dimention. I mean it was wasted. There was only one star as far as I could see. "Man, desolate place huh," Ray said. "Your telling me," I commented. "Let's head for the star," he said. "Going there now, but I feel something wrong, something really evil," I responded. When we got closer to the planetoid orbiting the sun we were astounded. "That is it?" Ray asked. "Yeah looks like a spacestaion with dirt glued on it," I said. "That is what I was thinking," he said back. We landed on it and saw that it had a very thin atmosphere but it was breathable. We unloaded and started to the generator that was not very hard to find. It tool up about a fifth of the planetoids surface. "This is gonna be an easy job, we might get home in time for dinner," I said. "Don't get cocky, Destroyers don't put things in places for nothing," Ray said, "wanna crack the door?" I walked over and placed my palm on the door plate and it swung open. "I still don't see how you do that," he said. "It's all in the wrist," I said jokingly.
We drew our blasters and stepped around the first cooridoor, to our surprise there were no gaurds in the hallways. "It seems that no one is home," Ray said. Then when he looked in my direction to get my responce he found me in a little ball on the floor. "Whoah, got a problem?" he asked. "We have to leave, there is a really really huge evil here," I said slowly. "You are just freaking out, you don't know how to use your powers yet and they are moving a little bit and you are thinking alot," he said skeptically. "NO! I am seriouse, we are gonna die if we stay here," I pleaded. "Get up and come on," he said. "Why don't you believe me?" I asked in a very shaky voice. "Because you are not a trained Jedi," he said. "You try to sence it, use your little crystal thingys," I said. "Ok, Ok, I'll try," he scanned the area and turned back to me, "nothing, not a thing." "Ok, maybe I was stretching it," I said doubting myself, "let's go." We began to make our way through the generator untill we got to the main computer terminal. I stopped and scanned with my fragile Force powers. "I must be going haywire, I still feel a very cold place," I said. "Shutup with the big evil thing and get to work on the computer," he said.
I holstered my blaster and sheathed my saber and was about to place my hand on the computer when the big evil thing spoke, "I wouldn't do that if I were you!" Ray and I turned to see a huge humanoid about eight foot tall standing in the entrance. "Who (again don't go there) are you?" I asked. "You will know soon enough," the man spoke in a deep maniacle tone. Then he drew his sword, the blade a solid shaft of blue-white flame. He threw back his cloak to reveal his face, it was dominated by a huge gaping scar that ran from the top-left of his bald head to the lower right if his neck. I mean this thing was gross, it was about an inch and a half wide and was all swolen. Ray and I looked at each other, then back at our foe. "It's go time," I said. I held my hand into the air and activated my ring, then took out my saber and chose my lightsaber. Ray did his little freakout thing and drew his three bladed sword. The red skinned man charged us and before we could even move slashed across us. I got most of the force of the blow in the gut, but strangely I didn't get cut. Instead, the blade passed right through me. Ray on the other hand got almost cut in half. He fell to the ground and began to blead profusely. I felt it there, the dark force, bekoning me to call it to use. I just extended my blade and leaped high in the air. I brought my blade straight down through the man's body. Or at least where it was. I looked around to find that he wasn't there. I looked behind me and found him. unfortunatly his foot found my back and I collapsed. I stood back up and ran at him. I began to slice and slash at the man but he was to quick for me to hit. After twenty minutes of fighting he held his hand up in the air and dissappeared. Then I remembered that Ray was hurt. I ran back over to where he was but he wasn't there either.
I ran throughout the room looking everywhere. Then the evil voice spoke again, this time over the Force, "I have the Chosen One," it said. "I have no fault with you yet, but rest assured your day will come, and soon all dimentions will feel my wrath. I will become supreme ruler of the total Vortex. Leave now and I might spare your life for a short time, but if you insist on staying you will face the fate of all the pitiful scum that inhabits the Vortex's Dimentions." "Listen Buddy, if I were you I wouldn't turn my back on Ray, because by now he has healed himself and is probably standing ready to skewer you when you turn around," I said. "Oh, I don't quite think so, for you see that my blade does damage to him that equals the amount of damage that a regular human would take from a regular sword. The many years I spent alone in this hell hole have paid off by giving me a new understanding of the Vortex's power," he said. Then I guess that he turned around or something but he said, "Where is he? Where is he?! WHERE IS HE!?!" "Hate to say it but, I told you so," I said. Then I opened a portal to our backup meeting place in Earth Beta and hopped in. As I left all I heard was the evil man's voice screaming, "I WILL FOLLOW YOU TO THE ENDS OF THE UNIVERSE!"